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Three Minutes a Day, by Richard Dixey - Week One: Candle Flame Watching

 


So - here's one of the books I'll be working through.  This is quite a new one, but the approach called to my faddy self.  His idea is that there are many ways to meditate, but a lot of us seem to have an idea we have to be peaceful to begin, sit on the floor with incense, and compose ourselves to think of nothing for maybe ...an hour!  In other words, our idea of perfect meditation right from the start.  It's so perfect, it's not doable.

He suggests we junk this idea, and instead spend 3 minutes every day doing a meditation technique.  Each technique is practiced for 7 days, so you get a feel for it.  Then you move on to the next one.  And go on like that for 14 weeks.  So that because its such a small amount of time, you'll feel its doable to try.

One of my biggest problems with anything spirituality related is my inability to be consistent with a practice.  I'm either working 14 hours a day (summer) or I'm frantically trying to catch up from the exhaustion of summer with my other desk-bound job (winter).  My youngest needs lots of attention and company.  I need to read for joy.  I need as much sleep as I can get.  In summer, my working means I don't even cook meals, as I'm never there at the right times, and when I am, having just come from a kitchen, the last thing I want to do is cook and wash up.

So this 3 minute idea is good.  I'm in the winter portion of the year now, and 3 minutes - for the love of all that's reasonable! - should really be doable.  Richard Dixey's idea is that you not only get a taster of all the different meditation methods, but that you see the benefits of them, pretty soon, even from just the 3 minute a day attempts.

So I'll review my progress going through the weeks.

Week 1 - Watching a Candle Flame


 
Photo by Paolo Nicolello on Unsplash

I've just finished week 1.  

My exhub used to be big on meditation, and knowing my mental restlessness, this was the first meditation he suggested I try, many years ago.

I seem to remember I had more perceived success with it too.  This time round, my main report is that I did manage to stay with it and get 7 days done, all at different times of day, whenever I realised I had some time.  Once I was lying in bed and remembered I hadn't done it that day and had no candles to hand - so downloaded a candle flame app on my phone and watched that for 3 minutes!  Ah, the utter laziness of us Westerers who can't be arsed to get out of bed and fetch a simple candle (...though it was a bit cold, in my feeble defence).

As soon as I would start to focus on the flame, my mind would kick into overdrive and do all the frenetic To Do list thinking - what to do next, after that, what I'd already done not very well; would I do it better later? etc. I remembered that I've read in loads of places that you're still meditating even if this happens - the fact that you notice it and just say - hah, got you! and then return to staring at the flame means you're doing it.  The constant returning of attention to the flame was definitely the theme of this week.

I thought I would spend more time thinking how pretty the candle flame was, or noticing the glow around it, in which all the rainbow colours lie in waves.  But I mostly got a bit irritated that after this, I would probably be reading, and I'd have that afterimage of the dark spot of the flame in my eyes for 5 minutes, making reading difficult!

Noises around me abounded - youngest talking to himself; TV from another room; people coming up and down the stairs; texts and emails arriving with their little notification jingles.  I deliberately didn't isolate myself totally from life as usual while doing this - I thought it was important that I try and do this amid life, not seperate from it.  I took myself into a different room from everyone else, and made it as quiet as I could, but I didn't aim for the perfection of no noise; as my life is rarely like that. I need to be able to focus in the real world, not an artifial one only.

My report here is simply that I did it - I didn't find this particularly calming, or notice my mind starting to still in a nice disciplined way.  But this is just the beginning - I'm heartened I did a week.

I'll report back at the end of Week 2, with this week's method (which I have yet to read).

There's also an app on Playstore (and the Apple equivalent) for this book, also called 3 Minutes, where each week is helpfully laid out with a timer - you can pick the end sound.  So if you don't have a timer or your phone to hand, the app will catch you.

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